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Tom and Katie Kiss

Tom & Katie kiss Ewwww. F&ck! Ew ew! My eyes, my eyes! For your viewing displeasure, a new set of photos from Rome…Day 2 of the New Era. Here’s a back view of the couple arm in arm.

I wonder if he commissions NASA to construct his lifts because Katie, at 5′9′ on a short day, is STILL 2 inches taller than the Top Midget on a tall day at 5′7′. Isn’t it astounding the things money can buy??? (by the way, she has the most f*cked up feet, like, ever!) Anyway, there are probably only 2 people on the planet, aside from the faux lovebirds themselves, who are actually happy about the whole thing. I’m sure Brad and Angelina are super relieved that finally the heat is off of them for a while. Or maybe not. In terms of publicity stunts, this certainly blew their maybe/maybe not budding relationship outta the water. And it’s yet another piece of evidence that this Katie/Tom thing is a collossal hoax. Mr & Mrs Smith opens on June 10th. War of the Worlds drops on June 29. Brad is 41, Tom is 42. Brad has dated and/or married Robin Givens, Gwyneth Paltrow, and Jennifer Aniston. Tom has dated and/or married Mimi Rogers, Nicole Kidman, and Penelope Cruz. Brad has been named People’s Sexiest Man Alive twice, most recently in 2000. Tom has had the honour only once…way, way, way back in 1990. You see the pattern? Tom, jealous diva that he is, is clearly starting a very public pissing contest for box office and penile supremacy. Which is a big mistake. Huge. Obviously, he hasn’t seen the size of Brad’s c*ck. (If you haven’t and you want to…let me know. I’d love to slap it on the site but I’m afraid someone will sue my poor Chinese ass and I’m not rich and famous enough yet to countersue them back for emotional harassment.) Something tells me little Tommy Boy is no match for our Mr. Pitt in the length AND girth department. And really…isn’t that all that matters??

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Tom and Katie Kiss

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